Something to consider The next time you are bound To visit with your dentist For cavities you’ve found. The medical tribunal In London’s fabled town Oversees the medics, In counsel to the crown. Brought before the trio, A Dr. Hutchinson, Alleged to be deficient In dentistry he’d done. “Sir, it’s been reported, By patients in your care, When practicing your practice No gloves you ever wear. It’s also been detailed, By those you have employed, You utilize quite oddly Those dental tools deployed. You clean your fingernails With tools you then insert Into your patient’s cavities, Or so some here assert. Dr. Alan Hutchinson It seems a little weird, You clean your ears with tweezers Until your ears are cleared. But these offenses pale They really seem quite tame, When measured by the tale For which your nurse here came. A final question queried About your dental ways, Then we will issue findings - Condemn you or we’ll praise. In practice as a dentist For years of twenty-eight; Do you think within the spittoon You ought to urinate?” The testimony given, All witnesses he’d faced, The medical tribunal Upon him guilt has placed. He’s not out of business, Another hearing’s set To determine if his hygiene Serves up a dental threat. A wave of nausea rises In patients he has known; And as for new appointments, Not likely they’ll be prone. A checklist for your dentist Before he parts your lips; He’s zipped and wearin’ latex Upon his fingertips.