I’m startin’ a cult Do you want to join in? I’m invitin’ a few Of my friends and my kin. We’ll sacrifice chickens At an altar I build; And pray to the trees After they’re killed. We’ll wear special clothes Made of satin and silk; Amass a large fortune From people we bilk. We’ll live in a compound Out in the woods; Guns and grenades Will protect all our goods. I’ll preach what I hear In the radio waves I hear in my head From the dead in their graves. My power will grow And my influence felt As the words that I speak To others are dealt. The Feds will observe us As we gather and grow; And intercept mail That we send to and fro. A threat to the country, That’s what they will claim; My message divisive My motive is fame. The lost and the lonely, Disillusioned and poor Disciples will be In my own private war. Protected by warriors, The power I’ll abuse. To corrupt and disrupt Myself to amuse. Should you choose to begin To follow my lead And join in the cult Your possessions you’ll cede. In exchange you’ll be housed With believers and fed; You’ll pledge your devotion And to me you’ll be wed. I’ll devise a great plan When the time is at hand And lead you to splendor In a far away land. In a month of blue moons, On a dark chilly night, We’ll drink of a potion I’ve concocted for flight. Adorned in our robes We’ll shake chicken bones And chant as we lie On a bed of dry stones. Together endeavored Then eternally fly Beyond the constraints Of the earth and the sky.