He’s eighty-six, a healthy run Well passed the average age A fella’s suppose to live these days; He’s ripe by any gauge. He’s got himself a younger babe He’s taken for a bride; Give or take, she’s half his age, But she’s the one he eyed. She’s not very nice to him, He’s fodder for her jokes; She amuses all around When at him fun she pokes. They’re at a restaurant, out to eat When she begins to fling Morsels from her plate of food Into his face that sting! When other patrons intervene, She then picks up the pace; ‘Til food is bouncing off his chin And all around his face. The manager is summoned then But she picks up the fork, And stabs her husband’s hand with it Then pops it like a cork. She begins to poke his face ‘Til blood is dripping down; His countenance takes on the look Of someone with a frown. The cops were summoned to give aid And arrested was the bride; And she’ll be facing charges now, Her guilt a judge decide. She might have had a pretty face, A catch at eighty-six; But I’m thinkin’ he’s not happy With how she get her kicks.